When her partner prioritized a music concert over her cousin’s wedding, one woman began to question his commitment.
Let’s break it down
The backstory and early dynamics
I’m a 28-year-old woman, and I’ve always been especially close with my cousin. We’re the youngest of eight grandchildren and were practically glued at the hip throughout childhood. While she lives in Illinois and I’m in Colorado now, I still consider her one of my closest family members.
She’s getting married this September, and I was excited to be there. Months ago, I RSVP’d “yes” for both myself and my partner (33M), assuming we’d attend together. I know how important RSVPs are, especially for weddings where catering is often priced per person. Plans were set, and I was looking forward to a meaningful weekend.
The moment things shifted
Then came the Tipper announcement — a final two-night concert at Red Rocks, the same weekend as the wedding. My partner is a huge fan. This is Tipper’s retirement, and Red Rocks is iconic, so I understood how special it was.
We planned to go to night two of the concert, which felt like a perfect compromise. I even invited my brother and friends to make it a full celebration. But then, out of nowhere, my partner started grumbling about going to the wedding.
He asked, “Why do I have to go to that wedding? I want to go to Tipper.”
I tried explaining that the wedding is important to me. This isn’t some distant family member — this is someone I grew up with. But his response? “I’ve never even met her.”
The final confrontation
I reminded him that he has met her, at least once — she confirmed it. But even if he hadn’t, that’s not really the point, is it?
This is about showing up for your partner. About being present for someone important to the person you love. About honoring a commitment we already made.
I’m not asking him to skip the entire concert. Just the first night. We’ll still have our big, unforgettable Tipper send-off the next evening.
But he doesn’t see it that way. To him, the concert is a once-in-a-lifetime thing. And apparently, that matters more than being at my side for one of my family’s milestone events.
The fallout
Now I feel stuck. I don’t want to force anyone to go somewhere they truly don’t want to be. But his resistance stings. We made a plan. He said yes.
If the roles were reversed — if it were his sibling or cousin’s wedding — I’d be there without hesitation, even if it meant missing out on something I loved. Isn’t that just what you do when you care about someone?
It’s not about one night at a concert. It’s about what his decision says.
What Reddit Thinks
Reddit would almost definitely vote NTA (Not The Ahole)** on this one. The community tends to favor loyalty, emotional maturity, and respecting commitments — all of which the poster upheld.
Sample comments
“You’re already compromising. If he can’t skip one night for something important to you, that’s a red flag. NTA.”
“This isn’t about Tipper — it’s about him not valuing your priorities. You deserve better support.”
“Honestly? He sounds selfish. One night at a concert isn’t worth blowing off a family wedding.”
There might be a few NAH (No Aholes Here)** comments too, understanding his emotional connection to the artist. But the vast majority would side with OP.
A Final Thought
In relationships, there are moments when what matters to your partner should matter to you — even if you don’t fully “get it.”
When personal passions and shared priorities clash, do we compromise — or reveal what really matters most?